A Mom's Personal Ad; Wanted....

Wanted:

Not just a babysitter.

Not family. Not a friend.

Not a body to keep my couch warm.

Wanted:

Someone to fall in love with my kids...  no one can possible love them as much as I do... someone who's goal is to come close.

Wanted:

Someone who is seeking to invest in the lives of my children.... in the next generation.... quite possibly the generation of her own children.

Wanted:

A playmate. Someone who, in a short couple of hours, can take my daily job to the next level... who can encourage imagination, someone who's goal is to have exhausted, sleepy, mentally and physically exhausted babies to put to bed at 8pm.

Wanted:

A photographer. Someone who appreciates that the time I spend away from my kids is a double-edged sword.... that time is precious and necessary for my own health but it's also the only time (quite possibly in a LONG time) that I have been split in two. They and their Daddy are my other half.... even if their Daddy is away with me, I'm missing a quarter of my life that completes me. Someone who will 'work' as hard as she can to be 'me' in my place.... and will send me a picture or two while I'm gone so they can still be with me, even though we're apart.

Wanted:

Their first love. I remember my childhood babysitter with the absolute best memories.... Heather. We went on bike rides, fed the cows around the corner, painted, played hide and seek, read books, made up our own stories, and when she put me to bed, I couldn't wait until the next time Mom and Dad went out! Someone who will 'work' to win my kids' hearts.... so when she puts them to bed, she takes the smallest piece of them with her... until next time. Someone who, when a week too much has passed, will gently remind me that she loves my kids and wants to see them soon ;-)

Wanted:

A 'soul' mate. Someone who will spend time understanding and dissecting their inner-most beings.... who can recognize their quirkiness and embrace their insecurities. Someone who can teach them and guide them in their walk with the Lord.... and their walk in life.

Wanted:

My confidante. Someone who can find a balance between being their trusted friend.... and being mine, when it comes to them.

Wanted:

A human. Someone who doesn't strive to be perfect but who's priority is to be the best she can be for them, in the short time they're hers. Someone who admits short-comings and doesn't try to hide behind the check at the end of the night. Someone who isn't afraid to call or text me if she has a question... big or small! Someone who understands that asking me a question is good for my heart when I'm away ;-)

Wanted:

A good listener. I know my kids better than anyone.... and my full-time job revolves around the routine and schedule that, the outcome of MANY trials and errors, works the absolute BEST for my kids. Someone who will tune in 100% to my (sometimes lengthy, often-times redundant, and sticky-note involving) list of expectations. None of them are obsurd... all of them are crucial.

Wanted:

A nurse-minded individual. My kids are precious and fun and lovable... but their medical history HAS to be known by any and everyone who cares for them in my absence. This even includes their Daddy! Their medical history will always be displayed in an easy-to-find place... their medications, schedules, important numbers, etc. Tune in. Make a mental note of where the CPR instructions are posted (on the fridge ;-)) and understand that being with my kids does not increase the chance of you needing to follow those instructions.... but that, in order for me to trust you with their lives... I need to feel confident that you at least know where they are posted. This is a routine I follow every single morning... and I'm the mom!

Wanted:

A quasi-therapist. Someone who can understand and appreciate that no one loves these two children more than I do. No one is more invested in their lives, health, hearts, and future. Someone who will humor me and nod with understanding at my lengthy and repetitive explanations.... even if they make fun of me for it later :-)

Wanted:

Light housekeeper, nutritionist, and pet lover . The house is at least as clean after bedtime as it was when you got here (that's an easy one!).... dessert is a treat but snacks are healthy.... the dog has a chance to pee.

Wanted:

Me. Another me.

I've mentioned before that trusting people with my children is, hands-down, the hardest part of parenting for me. I don't take my job lightly.... I take it so seriously that, often-times, I make myself sick.

Becoming a Mom has challenged and tested my trust in the Lord exponentially.

I have felt so incredibly convicted lately.... I can't seem to shake the Lord's voice; He's telling me that I need to let go. I need to trust that the people He brings into my children's lives will be good for them.... that I'm actually depriving my kids by denying them the opportunities to know and trust other people who love them...

And I'm denying those people the opportunity to know and love two of the most amazing miracles they'll ever know.

That's a hard reality to face.

Don't get me wrong... I've trusted other's with my kids. Joey Mom, my Mom and Dad, my brother and his wife, and a couple babysitters who I (and Hannah) have loved! We've moved a lot in the past couple of years.... and family lives hours away and babysitters are now off at college.

But let me tell you something..... leaving Hannah with a babysitter was one of the hardest things I've ever done... but I did it and it was a step that was healthy for all of us; me, Joey, and Hannah.

Even thinking about leaving Hunter is another story entirely!

I won't find another me...

But I have to start trusting that someone else can be a wonderful variation of me in the lives of my kids when I take a few minutes for the real 'me'.

Wanted:

One kid-crazy, Jesus-loving, psycho-Mom-accepting individual to invest herself 100% in the lives of my children a few hours a week so their lives can be richer and their Mama's can be calmer. That Mama? You'll love her.... eventually ;-) Her kids? You'll love them immediately!